33 Savoring Our Friends In Italy
My last week in our town seems
to have passed in a blur. I ran out of food and money, but Spencer was used to
just eating pasta without any sauce at meals by this point. Then my Italian
friends figured out we were eating scraps and we suddenly were invited to everything.
Everything we ate from that point on was stupendous. The women here cook with
such effort and love that you can feel it coming from the heartfelt food that
was served. It reminded me of my mom’s cooking. They kept it up all the time. Every
day, 3 times a day or more, the women just made the best
food. Even being hungry turned out to be a blessing here.
We ran out of gas energy so we suddenly no
longer had hot water or our stove for cooking. That was sort of a last straw. I
kind of NEED to take a shower daily and I took two cold ones but I was not
going to subject Spencer to more then 2 days of that so when I got 60 euros
from Gordon via many days worth of waiting for it to show up at the ATM, I
bought gas that afternoon and was delighted to take a hot shower and be late
when going over to the Bar.
Spencer and I had taken to not using the
computer much during our last week at the Bar…we wanted to talk to our friends
and appreciate them instead. It was especially nice since the last week we were
there the kids were out of school and they could play all the time.
Our time became precious since there was
so little left. I was excited when I was given the treat of getting to look at
my friend’s wedding pictures. I got to look at family wedding photo albums with all the lushness that the area has to offer in its
splendor. There were green rich meadows for the bridal couple to be photographed
while walking, kissing and loving each other. It was amazingly romantic. I have
to admit. This countryside would be the most perfect place to be with a
romantic partner. I thought my older son, who proposed to his girlfriend while I was
gone, should bring her here and just explore the countryside and roam around in
this land of extremes. It is both wild and civilized terrain. I knew that the people here seemed to
actually be quite caring of the English speakers who wandered through their
midst, and they would take care of any couple who wandered through but I know
my son would be amongst friends that would take care of them both here.
It reminded me of how patient they had
been with me this whole 5 weeks. Almost every day I said something wrong,
insensitive or plain stupid. The nice thing is that the Abruzzo folk were so
easy going and classy, nothing seemed to phase them. As an example, I stupidly
cut in front of my friend at the post office, and she did not say a word. It
wasn’t until I was leaving that I figured out that no one stepped into the
inner office until the previous person was done at the Poste. I
apologized as I realized what I had done but the people here do not seem as tied up in protocol and exactitudes as I was. There was definitely
a protocol to follow and I am sure there was much more going on then I
understood, but overall, my friends were not overly concerned about my
stupidity.
That hit me strangely. I have lived my
whole adult life feeling that everyone else had a playbook and I was running
behind without one, but the level of my errors in comprehension and
understanding was tantamount to a Mount Everest
here. I just gave up worrying about doing things wrong since I would be afraid
to say or do anything if I held onto that fear. I just tried really hard to pay
close attention to everything that was said. All the time. I heard gossip and I
heard politics going on but for the life of me, I had no idea who or what was
going on even with all this Italian education I opted for.
That created a very freeing environment for
me. Since no one expected anything of me, I really did well. I did everything I
was told to do obediently and I was repaid for it EVERY day. Nearly every
interaction with my friends, brought me rewards that made
me feel happy and wonderful all the time. When my barkeep friend told me to get up and
follow her, I dropped what I was writing on the computer and even left my purse
in front of the Bar to do as she said. I was rewarded with the best homemade
pork sausage I have had in my left and a bottle of Giovanni’s homemade wine.
Even retieving these things with her was a treat, since they were located
in the bottom floor of one of their houses. I found myself looking at the most
beautiful wine barrels and bottles of wine lining one whole wall. It certainly paid
here to do as I was told!
I loved to hear everyone talk. Especially
one man. I have no idea why he made me feel so good. I knew nothing about him,
even though someone carefully tried to explain something to me that was important
about him, it was also clear to me that everyone really liked the guy. Well, he
was really nice to everyone. He talked to the kids, men and women all the same.
He was sort of the well liked guy around town. I had no idea what he did for a
living or why I was attracted to his voice and smile so much but it was fun
just to be in the Bar and with my friends. During the last week I tried to be
around him as much as possible knowing that I would be satisfied with the
memory of his voice.
Also during the last week, Spencer and I
stayed up really late and went back to the Bar even after dinner, (which for
the CA version of me was REALLY late, REALLY late!!). Remember dinner started
at 8,30 at night, so after dinner meant that I was leaving the house at 9,30
and staying out until after 11 o’ clock at night! I loved seeing my friend's face,
listening to her sister's explanations of life in the area and their mother always made
me laugh. I loved how classy one of my lady friends was
as she sauntered in like a beautiful queen, always elegantly wearing a
sundress. I loved the way grown women here wore sundresses almost every day,
with extra pleats on the bottom or flourishes of ruffle near the neck. My
sundresses in CA are not so detailed. Gosh I have to say that I really loved
these people and the life I lived here. I even told my widow friend that I loved her
more then once. I kind of wish now I had told her grown daughters the same. I simply adored all of them. I just hope they come out to California
and I get to show them our life in California
