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Success, Failure...some of my greatest failures have been a springboard to my greatest successes...the terms are truly fluid.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Two Bricks and a Vow.....

When it comes to love I have to admit that I have been experiencing a much more violent form then my much happier sisters. Love often seems to hit me much like a brick to the head.

I have loved very worthy men. My husband was one and deserves my adoration still.

I think Joel does too...but it is obvious to both of us that we can not spend a long weekend, 4 days together and stay happy.

Right after I wrote that piece I found my heart on the floor and the proverbial brick to the side of the head...if he had not been such a good match it would have felt good to part...instead I have spent the last two days licking wounds that are far deeper then I care to admit.

I just finished a marathon session of silently snivelling into a blanket and getting over him.

I was hit by two bricks yesterday and I think that one hurt just as much...can't go into it...but it still is crushing...and add to that the frustration of having internet and computer problems while finishing off one of the last terms of my BA level work at OSU...and my aggravation is EXTREME!!

So it was definitely time for a solid good long cry...I thought I cried  enough for a year with the last round of letting go of Joel...I guess that was why I tried it one more time...he felt the same obviously or we would not have given it one more shot.

I wish I could be as cavalier as I was last time I was was hard to notice while I was having the time of my life in Italy or Wales...but right now the pain is acute and I am embarassed to admit to succumbing to a marathon session.

It was my Ex who dutifully sent me texts to life my spirits and after he got my text Joel as well....

I will feel better tomorrow of course...but today is not a great day and yesterday was worse...but I have noticed a pattern I do believe in. When bad stuff happens something good always comes of it...but if I ever give you any advice when it comes to romance my advice to you is to laugh and ignore me...anyone else is bound to be a better advisor then me...but I can admit that I have gotten it right before and I know it is not impossible because I have lived happily ever after before and someday...I will again. We can bank on it.

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